Autopilot

How did I get here?

You wonder

What day is it?

You ask

Did this happen yesterday or last week?

You question

To whom did I speak an hour ago?

You try to recall

 

All your days look the same

They all feel the same

A monotonous blur

Flavorless

Meaningless

 

You change your outfits every day

You apply your makeup in the same way

You take the same route

You make the same small talk with the same people

You aren’t listening to them

Nor are they to you

 

You stopped caring

Why should you?

Your hands are keeping their grasp on reality

Your mind wandered away long ago

What will happen if your hands slip?

Will you fall?

Or just float, bobbing like a buoy on the surface of the sea?

 

You search for the light

You crave the hope

You pray for tomorrow

Because you’ve given up on today

And lost faith in the lessons of yesterday

 

You walk without the aid of your consciousness

You talk without assistance from your mind

You live without the attachment to your body

You exist in a vacuum

Your body functions of its own accord

It senses and reacts

 

You feel nothing

You exist within

You are detached

You are disconnected

You are alone

You fear tomorrow and despise today

You wish for a change

You wish to feel again

 

Limbo

 

The uncertainty is punishing

Impossible to bear

Living in limbo

Your hair about to tear

 

Anxious about tomorrow

What it will bring?

Will it float you ahead?

Or lead you to sink

 

Irritating stagnation

Putting you on edge

Between you and your patience

Driving a wedge

Advertisements

Her Anger

Her anger comes from a place of sadness

It hurts when she smiles and it slays her kindness

Her tears turn to steam when they touch her cheek

It’s when her fury reaches its peak

She wants to tell them all her pain

But her confession will surely ruin the game

No one will listen to the screams of a little girl

So why would they care about a woman’s nerves when they twirl

They lie to her face as they lie to themselves

She lies as well, but in her anger she dwells

Lost in an unforgiving world

She pretends, but in bed she’s curled

Unsure and broken most days

The pressure fuels her craze

A strong woman, it’s undeniable

Still vulnerable no matter how reliable

Seen as a force by some

By others a nuisance, a joy by none

On the verge of tears

Bottling up her fears

She absorbs every stab

Every word, slur and jab

Uncertain that a bright tomorrow will ever come

She takes a pause before she sprints to a run