Enveloped by Darkness

Enveloped by darkness day after day

Surrounded by friends ready to play

Alone in a crowd cheerful and smiling

Drowning inside dying and crying

Isolated as usual with limited choices

Invisible among them, but no one notices

Critical sometimes they are of my ways

Silent or furious are my moods without delays

Hearing their voices but not listening to their words

Because often they slay me like sharpened swords

Not great company I am I know

But where else am I supposed to go

Trapped inside myself away from reality

Despising its expectations and meaningless futility

Away when among them, away when alone

Haunted by demons that were birthed at home

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Monsterous

Locked in an internal box

Living in a monsterous world

Devoid of life

Broken extremities

Hanging off of a robotic skeleton

Skull cracked

Lonely beings

Putting on a theatrical performance

Methodical actors

Soulless the experience

Lying behind meticulous masks

Hopes shattered

Bloody streets

Contaminating the senses

Meaningless

Cut through the noise

Stitching the mouth shut

Wordless

Grey Sheet

A grey translucent sheet is cast in front of my eyes
Distorting my view and signaling my demise
I see the world often so bleak
A crippling feeling that hinders my ability to speak

Past regrets and pains swimming in my mind
Rendering me virtually blind
Absent I am from the events of the present
But I try and often fail to seem almost pleasant

Regretable choices not truly chosen
By a heart once beating and now sits frozen
Trying to please eveyone but myself
I commit to decisions made by eveyone else

Fears take charge of a boggled mind
Detaching it from reality and forcing it to hide
Creating a world so it can try to survive
The tortured self has not yet been revived

Ashes

The fire has died

And all I’m left with are the ashes

The grey remains of what once was

A silver powder, which will disappear with the slightest breeze

 

The earth is spinning

And I’m standing still not moving

The shadow of the person I used to be

A distant image is the life I had once desired for myself

 

The future is uncertain

And I have no remedy

The days seem bleaker with every passing month

A tragedy of loneliness too dark to describe too real to endure